If a person has not left instructions for what to do with their ashes after cremation, it’s down to the remaining family members to decide the best course of action. There are a few options for what to do with ashes after cremation, which can often lead to conflict in families.

Acting too quickly in the days and weeks that follow the cremation could lead you to make the wrong decision that you later come to regret. Instead, it’s advisable to keep the ashes in ceramic cremation urns until you have had time to process your grief. When the cloud of grief has cleared a little, you will be in a better position to make a decision about what to do with the ashes.

Remember that you don’t have to choose just one. You could split the ashes, allowing you to keep everyone in your family happy by ensuring that everyone gets what they want. There is no reason you shouldn’t split the ashes, so if it makes sense to split them, you needn’t feel guilty about this. Here are some of the options available to you. 

Keep the ashes in your home

Keeping the ashes in your home in a decorative or simple urn is one of the easiest choices. You can display the urn in a prominent place in your home, or you could keep it hidden away. There are no rules when it comes to displaying ashes, so you can do whatever feels right to you. Ashes could also be split into multiple urns, so that other family members can feel the same comfort and reassurance.

Bury the ashes

If you don’t want the ashes in your home, a popular choice is to bury them, just as you would a casket. The crematorium will likely have plots for sale where you can bury the ashes and place a memorial plaque. This will give you a physical gravesite to visit and leave flowers on special occasions. You could also bury the ashes in your garden or a popular beauty spot, provided you have the permission of the landowner.

Scatter the ashes

Scattering the ashes is perhaps the most well-known option following cremation. This completes the circle and allows the body to return to the earth or the ocean. Choosing the right place to scatter ashes could be difficult, particularly if family members cannot agree. If you would like to scatter the ashes on private land, you will need the landowner’s permission. Popular spots to scatter ashes include lakes, rivers, the beach, mountains, woodland and sports grounds.

Add the ashes to a keepsake

Scattering or burying the ashes can feel very final, so some people prefer to retain some of the ashes for a memorial keepsake. There are so many memorial keepsakes available, ranging from diamond rings to vast artworks for your home. These memorial keepsakes typically only require a spoonful of ashes per piece, so you could commission multiple pieces for family members to give them all something to hold on to. Memorial keepsake jewellery is a popular choice as it is personal and discreet, but can bring a great deal of comfort to those managing their grief.

Coral reef urns

Did you know that ashes could become a habitat for new coral reefs to form? Companies are turning cremation ashes into building blocks for coral reefs, allowing your loved one to become part of the marine habitat. This would be an ideal choice for anyone who loved travel and adventure, as their remains would become part of a rich and complex ecosystem.

Set them into fireworks

If your loved one enjoyed causing a scene, then there could be no better tribute to their life than putting their ashes into fireworks. You could create an entire display and invite friends and family to celebrate their life one last time. The ashes will then be scattered over a larger area, removing the need to physically scatter them yourself.

Turn them into a record

Some companies are allowing individuals to add their loved one’s ashes to a vinyl record which can be played just like any other record. The ashes are pressed into the vinyl pellets and then this is used to press a recording. This could be a personalised message or a beloved song that your family will cherish for generations to come.

Add the ashes to a garden statue

Commissioning a statue that contains the ashes of your loved one is a touching way to pay tribute and to create a memorial garden in their honour. You could have the ashes set into a concrete statue or a glass sculpture. Both would be beautiful additions to a memorial garden which would also give you and your loved ones a place to visit for a moment of quiet reflection.